Thursday, June 13, 2019

Extending the gift of presence:)


There are a few events that you feel like rewinding, and this was one of them. As we were walking on the highway, we saw a dog stumbling in front of a car. The car driver did not stop. Meanwhile, a teenage boy ran towards the dog, held him in his arms as if he were a small baby, and ran towards his home. Midway, we saw him pausing and placing the dog on the road.

Swara asked me if I wanted to go to the kid, and I said yes. The kid kept holding back his tears while looking at his dead dog. Meanwhile, the boy's grandmother came running in our direction and started scolding him for carrying his dead dog home and for all the time and love that he had invested in the dog. More family members joined in the chaos. At the back of my mind, I had flashes of a few deaths that I witnessed, and how the social chaos did not let me get in touch with how I was feeling. It had taken a few years to reconnect with and listen to that voice again and to make peace with it.

In between, the grandmother looked at us and identified us as parikrama-vasi, so she invited us for tea at her place, but we declined for the time being and stayed with the boy and the dog. Swara intertwined the chaos and asked the boy if he wanted to pray for a few minutes for his dog. Tears kept flowing while we held hands and prayed in silence. I could feel the pain of death, my own attachments, pain for lack of space for expression, and for being vulnerable.

One of the family members gave him a washed shirt as there were bloodstains on his clothes. He silently changed it. His mother asked him to go after the buffalo that he had left on the farm so that they wouldn't eat away the harvest. With a heavy heart and a little hesitation to leave the dog, he started walking towards his buffalo. Before we left that spot, Swara asked him if he wanted to cremate his dog, but he denied it, partly, I assume, because of social pressure. We saw him slowly walking toward his buffalo as we started heading toward the highway.

We looked through our bags to see if we had something to share with the kid, and we found some grapes someone had given us in the morning. Swara went to him and share, along with coins and told ,him to do an act of kindness with that money. Before leaving, she extended a big hug to him. 

When Swara started walking towards me, the boy called her and started checking his pockets. Swara thought he would be giving the money back. Instead, he took out the two ice candies that he had gotten for him and his younger brother and shared them with her, saying one is for her and one is for your sister:) I was witnessing this beautiful moment from a distance,e and this time it was tears of love flowing from our eyes. We knew how priceless those ice-candies were to the child, and to witness his giving, especially when he had lost something very close to his heart, was invaluable. We were walking through one of the driest patches, with no trees on the road, on a sunny morning. This encounter with the little kid made our hearts drenched in unconditional love, and we were reminded of the song Arun Dada sings, which includes the line, "Ankho ma pani to have ne jai nathe bhetar bhinash thate oche". (Water in the eyes comes and goes. But the moistness within never dries)    

While reflecting on what just happened in the last hour, I realized I might have witnessed the accident, maybe prayed, and silently walked ahead. It was a gift my co-pilgrim extended to me, which I experienced as the power of presence. I was thinking that in the later years, the boy might remember us. Not sure of that, but I would at least make an attempt to pause and share my presence next time. Grateful to my co-pilgrim for being the torchlight; where my consciousness ends, she gently shows me a step further:)




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